Have to → Get to
Nov 21, 2025
What have you accomplished this year?
Most of the time when asked that question, I find that people pause. “Well, let me think…” they say, eyebrows raised as they scan the back of their brains.
This past week was my birthday and as this personal milestone seems to come with increasing (and alarming!) frequency, I took some time to honestly reflect on the past year.
Alright Christian, so what have you accomplished this year?
As I reviewed and reflected, my mind was flooded with people, experiences, and unique moments.
As I sat there looking BACKWARD at my calendar, I noticed something ironic…
Maybe this happens to you too.
(Photo: Looking backward changes perspective)
I realized that normally, when I look FORWARD at my calendar…
Mapping, planning, strategizing, scheduling…
I typically ask myself:
WHERE do I fit THAT in?
HOW will I get THAT done?
WHEN will THAT be finished?
In contrast as I sat there reviewing my year in retrospect, I noticed a completely different set of questions in my heart and mind:
How WONDERFUL was that?
How LUCKY was I?
How THOUGHTFUL they were…
How SPECIAL was that?
How MUCH did I learn from them?
See the difference?
(Photo: Calendars make us ask different questions)
The hard stuff I went through? I felt a degree of compassion for my past self.
The great stuff I experienced? I cheered for… and relived… the events all over again.
The unique moments I shared with others? I felt grateful that they had taken the time.
Do you notice the difference between looking FORWARD in my calendar vs looking BACKWARD?
Here’s why this matters:
Isn’t it interesting that when we think about our future… which is so abundant… we are often driven by questions based in scarcity?
And yet when we review our past… which is finite and gone… we often wrap it language filled with abundance?
I then asked myself… how would my life be different if I brought abundant filled questions and emotions looking FORWARD just as much as when I look BACKWARD?
A friend taught me of this recently.
We were at a social function, and as my wife and I talked with him, he introduced his teenage daughter.
As my wife is an educator and I frequently work with youth, we both asked sincere questions about her future goals and college plans.
My friend commented that he was impressed with our questions and I responded, “Well I better have good questions because this is what I have to do every day.”
He stopped me and said, “No… you GET to do it every day. It’s a privilege to GET to help people. Every day.”
Do you feel the difference? That subtle word change has a MONUMENTAL shift in energy.
And made a shift in me.
(Photo: celebrate often)
So when you take time to reflect on the future (or the past) notice the questions you ask yourself.
Are your questions filled with scarcity?
Or abundance?
And how would your life be different if the questions you asked yourself were filled with more gratitude, kindness, compassion and grace?
Then maybe… one day at some important milestone… when you ask yourself, “What have you accomplished this year?”
What if your answer could be:
This year, I lived abundantly.
Christian
CHRISTIAN HANSEN has gone behind the scenes in some of the biggest organizations in the world to find out the reasons why some people get chosen and why others don’t. As the #1 bestselling and LinkedIn Top Ten ranked author of “The Influence Mindset: The Art & Science of Getting People to Choose You” Christian helps teams and organizations who want to stand out and be the obvious choice. With degrees from Brigham Young University and The London School of Economics, he’s helped thousands of individuals position and sell themselves. A fan of international communication, history, and choral music, he currently lives in Utah with his wife. Reach him at: TheChristianHansen.com
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