Just Show Up
Apr 10, 2026
When things get tough… how do you know who’s really in your corner?
And more importantly… how do you show someone that you’re in theirs?
From what I’ve seen, the answer isn’t sophisticated. Nor is it complicated.
Rather, in my experience the best way to communicate that someone matters to you can be summed up in one sentence:
When things get tough, just show up.
Think about it. When you’ve faced difficult times, did the people who made the biggest difference…
Know the right thing to say?
Did they have a magic answer?
Did they tie the problem up with a tidy bow?
Or did they put on some jeans, drive over, pound on your door, and say, “Right. You’re not doing this alone anymore.”
A few months ago I was facing more uphill battles than I cared to admit.
While on the surface I put on the face of someone who was handling it all “just fine!” deep down I had doubts… and fears that were deeper still.
While I occasionally opened up and shared my struggles with people, I found a marked difference between those who were in my tribe vs those who were being merely polite.
You’ve probably experienced this same thing.
Lots of people say, “I’m sorry to hear that.”
Or, “You’ll get through it… I know you will.”
And don’t get me wrong… we can’t be there… all the time… for every person. I get it.
But when someone called and said, “Just talk. What’s going on?”
When someone met me for lunch and said, “I don’t know what to say, but what’s happening?”
When someone texted out of the blue saying, “Hey… just checking in.”
Even though they didn’t have a magic wand…
And even though the problem remained just as big, scary, and intimidating…
They just showed up.
And it meant the world to me.
Suddenly, the path was a little easier to walk, and the climb was a little less steep. And I’ll never forget the care and concern they showed.
Which brings us to you.
Is there someone who is “going through it” but you don’t know what to say?
Just show up.
Is there a person facing uphill battles, but you don’t know what to do?
Just show up.
Because that’s one of the strange things about meeting someone in the midst of struggle:
Your presence is more powerful than your solutions.
As it just so happens, at this very moment, I am in a hospital room facing this same challenge.
But this time? I’m standing on the opposite side of suffering.
My wife is in the early stages of labor for our first child. And in this early morning where the walls of time and reality seem unusually thin…
I cannot take away her discomfort.
I have zero control of the situation
And I honestly have no clue what to do.
But I suspect as we are about to embark on this new adventure of parenthood, the real secret to success has less to do with knowing the answers or the perfect thing to say.
Things I’ve spent a lifetime striving to learn and practice.
Rather, in this moment, I’m just beginning to learn…
Its all about putting on my jeans, holding her hand, and showing up.
Because I’m in her corner.
Christian
CHRISTIAN HANSEN has gone behind the scenes in some of the biggest organizations in the world to find out the reasons why some people get chosen and why others don’t. As the #1 bestselling and LinkedIn Top Ten ranked author of “The Influence Mindset: The Art & Science of Getting People to Choose You” Christian helps teams and organizations who want to stand out and be the obvious choice. With degrees from Brigham Young University and The London School of Economics, he’s helped thousands of individuals position and sell themselves. A fan of international communication, history, and choral music, he currently lives in Utah with his wife. Reach him at: TheChristianHansen.com
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