You’re Not Tired. You’re Foggy.
May 28, 2026
Have you ever had a hard time saying “No” to something?
Maybe it was an invite to an event. Or an opportunity someone offered.
Either way, you had to say no.
When that happened, did you feel a twinge of regret? Or maybe even FOMO? (Fear Of Missing Out)
I know I have.
But a conversation I had with a mentor this week changed how I look at saying “No”.
In fact, it flipped the whole idea upside down.
Here’s what happened.
I was walking them through my goals, and debating whether to say ‘No’ to a few emerging opportunities.
My hesitation? I was afraid I’d regret it later.
That’s when my mentor interjected.
“What if NO, really means YES?” they asked me.
“What do you mean?” I said.
“Whenever you are saying ‘No’ to something,” They replied, “it means you are saying a bigger YES to something more important.”
“Whoa…” I said, “I hadn’t considered that.”
They continued. “No to XYZ opportunity really means you are saying a louder YES to the stuff you already have going on.”
They then really focused on me: “So as you consider these options… what other opportunities do you want to say a bigger YES to?”
And that got me thinking. Where in my life is this already happening?
“No” to grabbing dinner with friends on a Friday night is really a YES to staying home and connecting with my wife and daughter.
“No” to that extra dessert is really a YES to my health goals I’ve been working towards.
“No” to that shiny opportunity is really a YES to the projects I’ve been invested in for a long time.
When I switch my “No” to a bigger “YES”… then all of a sudden…
The uncertainty?
The worry?
The FOMO?
… they all disappear.
Because I’m gaining clarity on what I prioritize.
And the moment I get clear on my priorities, an amazing thing happens:
I get more energy.
I recently heard a keynote speaker named Erika King train a group of entrepreneurs.
One idea in particular stopped me cold:
She said, “We don’t have fatigue. We have fog. Indecision costs us a lot of energy. Think about how much energy it takes to agonize over decisions! But the moment we get clear and move past indecision? That energy is freed up. Because clarity creates energy. And when we have radical clarity? We can have radical amounts of energy.”
That quote landed like a punch.
Because suddenly, the mentor’s question made even more sense:
What if NO really means YES?
Every “No” you’ve ever felt guilty about… might actually be a love letter to something else.
A bigger project. A quieter evening. A healthier you. A life you’re actually designing instead of reacting to.
So the next time a potential “No” sits heavy on your shoulders, don’t apologize for it.
Just ask yourself one question:
What am I saying YES to instead?
You might be surprised who’s standing on the other side of that answer.
Christian
CHRISTIAN HANSEN has gone behind the scenes in some of the biggest organizations in the world to find out the reasons why some people get chosen and why others don’t. As the #1 bestselling and LinkedIn Top Ten ranked author of “The Influence Mindset: The Art & Science of Getting People to Choose You” Christian helps teams and organizations who want to stand out and be the obvious choice. With degrees from Brigham Young University and The London School of Economics, he’s helped thousands of individuals position and sell themselves. A fan of international communication, history, and choral music, he currently lives in Utah with his family. Reach him at: TheChristianHansen.com
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